Angrezon ke zamaane ke jailor

Hum angrezon ke zamaane ke jailor Hain! Remember the Sholay scene? Asrani, the jailor comes in and there are two lines of convicts standing in front. He squeals in delight. He makes those unusual facial expressions. Like a parody of Hitler. Strains each sentence so that he's heard well by the people in front of him. He's dressed in khaki but he has a pair of black gloves in his hand. He has a stick in his other hand. He loves beating his breast with that stick and keep telling the people in front about his exploits. He also finally tells the convicts, let's them know actually that "humaare jasoos Charon aur faile huye Hain!" It is a threat. Implicit one. To deter people from trying anything funny in the jail. And there is a jasoos, a spy, who is actually active. Hariram Naaai. Naaai is barber in Hindi. Keshto Mukherjee. The duo, Jai and Veeru, come to know about the spy. They make a plan. They go and stand near where the barber is doing his work as a barber. They discuss a tunnel building strategy from the jail to somewhere out. The barber runs to the jailor and reports it. The jailor arrives in great style. The convicts stand quietly as he smartly whips off a basket and sees a iron rod kept on the ground beneath the basket. He holds that and burns himself. But he does not scold or punish his spy. So Jai-Veeru do their stuff again. They talk among themselves about a gun in the jail within the earshot of the spy. The spy reports. Jailor arrives with his cavalry. Then comes the immortal line: Aadhey idhar jao, aadhey udhar jao, baaki mere peeche aao. He inspects the line of convicts searching for the gun by scrutinizing faces, of all things. He tried to invoke terror in people by making faces. No one is terrorized. He is, by a couple of them. Then, the inevitable happens. Veeru sticks a wooden stump at his back, says he has to quietly do their bidding and they take the jailor to his office where they get their belongings and leave the jail. They even shove the key of the main gate and the wooden stump through the main gate window as they leave to show how moronic the "angrezon ke zamaane ke jailor" is. Our government man, you know who. Internal security and external affairs with neighbors. Lately, Kashmir and Maldives. Same to same. Got it?